We understand it hurts sometimes. First and foremost, why people seem to hang onto unhealthy relationships is simply because they take their minds off of those essential things that got them sick of it. What? He was abusing you and you left? Girl, put your mind on that and forget about the chocolate and the perfumes he got for you. That is more important.
Or maybe you caught him cheating? So do you want to stay with a man that doesn't care a hoot about you forever? You see if you put your minds on these kind of things, then you'll remember why you needed to do what you needed to do.
If it still hurts, I mean if you've been with someone for a while, it'd hurt to realize that they are gone.
Here are some tips to put you right back in shape
Ready for a fix? 1..2..3...and action :)
1. I know we've always known "Big girls don't cry"
No, that's a big hoax; big girls pretend not to cry. Cry if you want to. Let it all out. it's liberating, you'll feel better in no time.
2. Suicide is never an option. With suicide, you are the loser and the eternal loser. It's not a game, but you don't want to make him feel like it was totally 'good riddance' so put your chin up and check number 3.
3. Revel yourself in something you could actually enjoy.
I would suggest cooking and eating well. Trying out new recipes can be really interesting and fun especially since chances are that you might lose your appetite, resulting in you starving and looking worn out. Nobody said OD on food. You don't wan to look like a fat round ball. The aim is to kick the urge to starve away, so remember to keep it healthy.
4. This is the time to take a course, if you are not busy with work.
Yes something to keep you really busy and for some self development. You don't want to spend your time thinking about your ex and all the things he could be doing right then and possibly stalking him.
Also, you want something that will make you feel like you are not useless cause the frustration might bring in depression and loss of self esteem. Taking a course might be too much for some people (that don't wanna feel like bookworms lol) but really it's not restricted to something related to books. For e'g you can try dance lessons, fitness classes, cooking classes, fashion and styling anything fun to keep you busy or maybe subscribe to a motivational speaker that updates frequently you can have a steady supply of positive energy to keep you focused. The aim is to feel and stay productive and work more on making yourself s better person.
5. Give yourself a nice treat: A trip to the salon, spa, a nice vacation spot, shopping and the many ideas you can think of wouldn't be a bad idea. Remember to revel in the moment and truly let yourself relax. Now is the time to do those fun things you enjoyed doing when you were single e.g trip with your friends and not having to worry about anyone. Remember, no romantic vibes. Stay away from those couples that like to do PDA's . And no romantic books, movies, spots, songs...etc either
6. This is not the time to jump into another relationship. Give yourself time to heal. You are on a rebound and as humans that we are, there's no way you won't want to let off that steam on the next person, and trust me it's just wrong to punish someone for another person's mistakes. And a possible outcome is that you might just happen to lose a good guy that you would have appreciated if you had met him in a much convenient timing. If he really liked you, he'll wait.
7. Please do not stalk your ex. You can care less about whatever he's doing. Do you get? No checking and just checking up as you'd prefer to call it :)
8. Pay attention to your looks you don't want to bump into him looking like "My world has crumbled since you left me". Let him look at you every time he gets the chance to see you and want to slap himself hard for letting you go. Yes, it's the looks. Their brains are so tuned to the looks so get it right hahaha
9. Please ladies the new girl is not your enemy, and don't try to act smart by trying to manipulate your way into making her your friend either. No, just leave them alone. Now you are after yourself, so don't try to cheat yourself by letting them steal your time. You need all the time more than they do so keep it. Put it into making your whole self better.
10. It was easy for him to leave you because there was something you were lacking, let's face it. Sweetheart, try to think about what it is and work on yourself. It doesn't make any sense if there is no improvement, but if he was just being a douche bag, no need to kill yourself over it, step right on to tip 11.
11. Forgive him and move on. Let his mind be the judge. Holding on to grudges is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die. The amazing thing about forgiveness is that after you let go, you realize that the prisoner was no one else but you. He just wasn't yours so be thankful that you didn't hold onto the wrong one.
So many people have made the mistake of not being able to discern this so you're actually one of the lucky ones.
12. When you see him, say hello. He's someone that rocked your world so much (Apparently, that's why you're hurting) at least be matured and keep it as friends or better still acquaintances and not enemies.
13. Chances are that you might feel the pressure to be very successful just to show him that you can make it on your own. Don't be over ambitious. Keep things simple and just live your life. By managing to pull through all that and still running your life smoothly, he already sees you as successful. So there's no point over doing things. Just try to keep every aspect of your life very balanced and normal as though none of all that happened. Please don't go the "I'm so hard, yea yea yea" way LOL
14. And don't make the decision to never date again. Every experience in life is but for a reason. Take the lessons, leave the regrets and head on. That experience will help you recognize a good guy when you see him even more.
15. And finally, you've moved on. Things are going well, never feel like you need to go find him and rub it in his face that you're successful. He will see through you. As a matter of fact try to keep your conversations with him short when you happen to see him. "You know all those, last week I went to Dubai" And "I met this new amazing guy" kinda talks? It's so unnecessary. Leave everything to his imagination. Trust me, in his mind, he might even be seeing you taking frequent visits to heaven just to relax and you spoil things by telling him it's not that great. You dig? :)