Monday, 10 September 2012

"Love is blind"

Hey lovelies

I was on my twitter on Sunday evening when I noticed @gbemisoke sharing some amazing tweets as usual. She makes love and marriage sound so beautiful and I kept reading her tweets. No doubt she has a beautiful family and she always has a lot to share with her friends. As usual, I saw myself reading through them and wanting to go back and read some more. This afternoon I decided to go back and continue from where I stopped and I was so captured by the amount of wisdom that were deposited in those tweets.
I decided to share it here. It wasn't the first time she tweeted some great stuff that got me wondering why she didn't  put them all up in a blog post so more people can get the opportunity to see it. Perhaps, she was so busy and decided to just tweet them as the thoughts came and would make time to make something out of it when she could. I thought this because I do that myself. Surprisingly, I'd check her blog days/weeks after and I'd realize that she didn't put them up. When I read through her tweets this time, I knew I just needed to make this post.

She was talking about the difference between being with a man that had nothing because you simply believed that love was enough, and being with a man who had nothing but was able to sell a vision to you that was full of prospects. It immediately reminded me of a discussion I had with my friend once. Money matters in every relationship. Let us not try to pretend. But sometimes you just have to look beyond what he has in his pockets. I liked the part where she said "....this guy think. He's not going to be broke for long." She was referring to her husband, before they got married. It reminded me of  Myles Munroe's story too.
Let's face it, no woman wants to tie herself down with a man who does not have a dream. Do you think she doesn't care about how her children would be fed? A woman with a good head will always look beyond the "love is blind" phrase. Why? because at some point you will realize that the 6 packs, the handsome face and all that demeanor cannot send your children to school and what? Do you want to be that woman that has to do all the feeding, the thinking and everything that has to do with responsibilities while you have a man that is just a trophy husband? Sooner or later, you will become tired.
Some people miss it as much as concentrating on dating a man that is rich. Do you ever wonder how he made his money? He's probably living off of his father's wealth. That is just luck and it doesn't really count. Do you understand that all of that could fade away in one day? And what happens after? It is not about the size of the pocket, but the size of his potentials. How much he can think!
Gbemisoke also tweeted this
"If you choose the guy that got it all together, there are no guarantees too. What if life happens and he loses everything?"
You know the difference? A guy that can think can do it all again. It might take some time but if he did it before, he can do it again. He's got the raw materials, A VISION and that my dear is the greatest possession.
 "When he asked me to marry him, he sold me a vision I could believe in because I could see him walking towards it" and then she added "No one wants a bum, they'll have to support"
It is not just about the size of the dreams. You know what they say, "Talk is cheap"
It's about the person in question, the potentials. It could be small, it could be big, it could even seem very unrealistic, but the point is that at the end of the day, you need your head to be able to know if that is the guy of your dreams because your heart may decide to fall for every one, who knows?LOL
 Most times when people say "Love is blind" what they mean is that they forgot to use their heads".
They just get attracted by very superficial things and do not pay attention to the things that are very relevant - connectivity, being able to share your dreams and being able to project into the future. Most of the things you saw today will change someday, but what are those principal things you know you can hold onto in each other forever? Don't be mistaken, it is not the pretty face or the perfect figure. What would be left if all the designer labels were ripped off?
I'll finalize this post by sharing some of Gbemisoke's tweets and maybe you can get an insight into what I'm rambling about.

Gbemisoke's tweets laced with her story:

When The Hubs and I were still friends, we were talking one day and he said he wanted to quit his job. "Why, did you get another one?" No. 
He was spending more on transport and meals than his salary. He couldn't save and the job left him no time to do anything else.
He may not have had much back then, but I could see prospects. He sold me a solid life-plan. My love wasn't blind. 
He explained and I knew right there and then that he was the kind of guy I would like to marry. Good head on his shoulders.
I said to myself, this guy thinks! He's not going to be broke for long.
None of all that "my daddy is a so and so" that boys throw around. He was describing a future and inviting me to go on the journey with him
When we got married, we had one car. Mine. We lived in an apartment that was smaller than the living room of my dad's house.
Choosing to build and grow with a man is a calculated move. Not a "love is blind so money doesn't matter" thing.
Before you go off at the women for not wanting to start from scratch with you, what vision are you selling to her?
There are women who will stand by you even when you have nothing. They need to know you're going somewhere. Where are you going?

Find Gbemisoke on twitter:

Her blog: 

Enjoy your week lovelies
Love always


  1. Isn't Gbemi just the greatest?!? lol.

  2. I am going to extract a post from this blog post... i hope you dont mind and you get to read it!! proper refrences and acknowledgement promised.

    1. please send a mail to

  3. Awwww.

    This is so sweet and so... I don't have the words...
    Thank you MsJB. Thank you. You have made my heart smile. Thank you.

    @LadyNgo and @Toin, Thanks ladies.

  4. great tweets. now following Gbemi

  5. Very insightful, Ms Gbemi is great.

  6. Typical gbemi is so cool like that.I look forward to her tweets. I have learnt so much from her too.

    MsJB, thanks for writing this up in a post. God bless you both

  7. Gbemi is one lady who says it from her heart all the time. Cool tweets.

  8. Yea, she is real. I hardly go on twitter, but whenever I happen to, I find that her tweets make sense.

  9. Wow nice one..I've learnt something new from this post. I sure will follow Gbemi on twitter..

  10. you make me want to follow her on tweeter...Thats most def. a woman that loves her family and holds 'em dear

  11. Those tweets are nuggets. Now I am following her on twitter. She really did tweet some truths in those tweets.I hope she expands them into a blog post soon. Thanks for sharing this with us, MsJB.


  12. Haven`t been here in a min.. Hopr You Good. :)

  13. Amazing! Good point. No be say I no wan work with you o but you've got to give me something to work with. love it! :)

  14. Great points she has. I especially loved "he sold me a vision I could believe in because I could see him walking towards it". There's indeed a certain amount of 'sales and marketing' that goes with getting a partner.. lol

  15. Never heard of Gbemi but this makes sense. I love where she's like this guy thinks. He's not going to be broke for long. Lol. Makes sense.

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