Tuesday, 22 September 2015

Friend zone or?

Hey Lovelies
So recently, the association of friend zoned guys have been trying to raise alarms against friend zoning people. I have met a lot of guys myself who have serious issues with a girl trying to friend zone them. 
And my question to such guys is "Do you know what the other options could be?"

Oh well just so you know, sometimes it could get really nasty. When she tries to keep things cordial, appreciate it because there are worse zones.  I don't know why guys always think they can and should have every girl they fancy. She just cannot date you, you have to understand that. You may be all so 'mr best thing that ever happened since sliced bread' but she just might not be into you or that kind of stuff. You and I know that the equivalent of friend zone for guys would be 'hit and run' so why be so angry when she doesn't want to take your bait? Or you just want things to always go your way? 
Let me be honest with you, a girl that tried to push you to the friend zone is a very nice girl. 
It means she understands that she cannot date you but still cares about how devastated you might feel knowing just that.

I have had people say things like "trying to be friends with a girl you absolutely dig can cause the same feelings that can be likened to physical pain and you do not want to deliberately trigger that" Fair enough! But isn't that why we have words like 'self control' 'maturity' and the likes? So if you wanted to date your boss and you realized she is not into you, you would quit your job? 

So there was a guy that I did the whole "the most we can be is friends" thing and he flipped. Did I say guy? Make that guys! Story of my life. I always have friends or acquaintances wanting more. But this particularly one is interesting because after he was angry and left, he came back saying he had reconsidered the whole friendship thing and wouldn't mind. I told him it was too late. "When I thought we could be friends, I saw something I admired which disappeared when you flipped." I told him. Like a boss, right? Ain't nobody got time for all that. If I were to date every guy that came around, wouldn't he be the same one to carry placards of how much of a whore I was? When she says 'no', just understand that there are so many girls that you have directly or indirectly said no to too and it doesn't make her less humane. That is just how life is.

You cannot have every girl you want, and if she is nice enough to consider you a friend, you better be happy. Friend zone is not as bad as you guys make it seem, ok? It's actually a blessing not a curse. *insert a lot of nice friendship quotes here and a very friendly smile* Agreed, Yes or yea? :)

Love always

Twitter/Instagram: @janylbenyl

Photo credit: Source


  1. 'association of friend zoned guys', never knew they already had an association, lols.
    When it becomes so painful is when the intended needed to be brought to light and then, it dawns 'sorry, you have been zoned, no trespassing'. Then the guy/lady is weak and broken.
    The solution i think is never stay in a relationship too long before making your intentions known. Define the end from the beginning!

    1. LOL you are so behind on that revelation :)

      I appreciate the point you are coming from. I also think it's really important to be straight forward at the get go.

  2. Hian! Mother... All these Friend Zoning that you ladies are sharing up and down.. Diariosgodooo! Aha! WaRRapin nah! What are my now supposed to come and say on behalf of National Association of Friend Zone BroVers nah :)?!.. hehehe **Sits up on Jangolova Chair..

    Truth is.. Yes it hurts when a lady that I totally like.. (Oh sorry... I like a lot of ladies.. But oh well, you get my point nah Mama) tells me we can only be friends.. I m ean my Flabber is always gasted at that point... I mean there was this particular geh ehn.. Choi!!! I chased her for 4 years non stop.. Hoping and Praying that the Friend Zone fence would fall like wall of Jericho. But for wia?! latio bo?! the geh Dated my best Friend instead... and added "Nonso if you really love me, then you would want me happy.. and I am happy with falcao (not real name" Omo my heart broke into ten :(... Since that time ehn.. my eye e haf open wide.. jaaaaa.. and my have I learnt..

    Dating should not be mandatory now, Its not by fire or by force nah.. So to all the brovers that have been friend zoned.. my advice is... (wait for it)... There are many fishes in the water.. So a 'No'.. is not much of a Biggie no more..

    Nice post mama.. This was an amazingly fun read.. thanks for sharing.. and the crowd goes... Ooooooossshhheeeey Turn uP!


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